Mary Elizabeth Nun

Don’t sweat the small stuff. There’s a bigger picture in all of this. Take a breath. Look at it later.

From my mom, I learned to be strong, independent, outspoken, and to follow my intuition. I also learned to always be kind and generous, and to be a part of/or build community around me.

(Excerpt from an interview with Kelle Green, Retired from Retirement, Interior Designer, Community Builder, Volunteer)
Washington, USA

My mom is from Muskogee, Oklahoma. They moved to California when she was 12-13 years old and lived on a ranch. She was the oldest of three girls. They were all one year apart, and they had a really loving, and wonderful upbringing. My mom came from a wonderful line of independent and strong women.

She worked in Westwood as an executive secretary. She got a scholarship for her penmanship and went to College, back then they gave scholarships like that. My mom was smart, and very intuitive. She met my dad on a blind date and they had a wonderful relationship. I've always found my mom to be very outspoken. She was very much about her community, her clubs, her church, her kids. My mom was my best friend. I always knew where I stood with her. She was powerful and she was always there to empower me. When I get stuck in the weeds, she was always there to remind me “Not to sweat the small stuff. There’s a bigger picture in all of this. Take a breath. Look at it again later.”

One day, I remember getting my report card and I didn’t have straight A’s. Even as a child I was all about performing well so I wanted to always have straight A's. And she says to me very casually “So you didn't do as well. What do you have to look at? Look at that. What do you want to say about that?” Mom was great at pointing out that what is reflected in my report card is just a measure and it didn’t define who I am and who I get to be. I always felt very empowered with her. She gave me a lot of space to discover, and freedom to be and that actually allowed me to perform better. It was never about comparing myself to others. Mom did not subscribe to that so I’ve always felt free from constraints.

Because of that kind of upbringing, I like taking risks. I like doing things that I have not done before, or something I don't know anything about. I like learning. I’m lucky that with my parents, they never told me I couldn't do anything. They always supported my ideas.

I went to a parochial school, and it was very strict on the uniform. So I said, “Mom, I can't stand this. I've got to do something”. She recommended wearing crazy socks. And I did. I put on different colored argyle socks or socks with stripes, even mismatched. We were only supposed to wear plain white socks. I also wore oxford shoes and I would dye my shoelaces. I would just do and try on new stuff, careful not to go overboard so I don’t get in too much trouble with the nuns.

I started a gift store that was extremely tiny, and my parents were totally behind it. It was risky, it hadn’t been done before as a concept and it became successful. I realize then that I like living on the skinny branches which is probably helpful in my career and background in interior design and merchandising.

Just like my mom, I like being around people and surrounding myself with people who are up to something. I volunteered for many years as a coach for self expression leadership programs and this has allowed me to make a difference in the leadership and projects of many participants. When I’m coaching, I walk the talk, and so I continue making a difference for my direct communities as well. This has led me to do amazing habitat restorations in Channel Islands. I created a community around habitat restoration. I really wasn't qualified to take on that giant task but I knew in my heart I could do it so I made a bold request and went out there. They hired me, and I had no credentials except that they saw my burning desire to make a difference. I did the largest restoration of any of the islands, never done in that scale before. We grew over 14,000 plants. It was quite a project and it took three years. I'm really proud of that and it's a legacy. I was out there recently, and I saw how our plants are doing extremely well.

And when my husband and I moved to Walla Walla not too long ago, I started walking my dog, talking to the neighbors. Before you knew it we had a garden party, and now we're doing a garden tour, and that hasn't been done here in ten years. So I'm always creating community, and I'm always creating, I'm always a yes to community. And so it’s silly that to this day, I have all these careers that I do even when I retired a long time ago. I'm still very much working, involved in my community, and still pursuing many interests. I got so much of these qualities from my mom.